Monday, 26 November 2007

What haven't I done?

So after a most pleasant weekend of re-acquainting myself with my old nemesis C2H5OH, I find myself on a fantastic summer's evening babysitting my nephew and 2 neices, while their parents go and rock their bodies at Justin Timberlake.
I seriously don't know how full-time Mothers do this - I have spent the whole afternoon going No. Stop that. Daniel, share. Daniel, careful of Mia. Samantha, you didn't hurt yourself. Eat a carrot. Just one. Just half a one then.
I seriously sound like a nagging old bitch and I don't like it. I feel like that mean old baby-sitter that made you go to bed on time and just watched telly while you wanted to play. My favourite baby-sitter when I was young used to make up dances with us, and when we saw the headlights weaving up the driveway (Dad wasn't known for his stance on drink driving) would hurtle upstairs with us and throw us under the covers. I don't think I'm meant to be that type of babysitter. Luckily I never became a teacher as I wanted to.
These kids are pretty cool though. Daniel is all eyes and screams, and was telling me about a trip to Dreamworld. "I nearly DIED!" says he. "You ALWAYS nearly die," says Samantha, who bathes and dresses Mia more deftly than I. I am forced to endure half an hour of NumberJacks, the most boring programme for kids ever. "Daniel," says I, "this programme is doing my head in."
"Huh," says he. Mia in the meantime is trying to put her winter boots on, and getting iceblock in every crevice. The bathwater turns red when she sits in it. Samantha is running around in her undies picking out 49 books for us to read at bedtime. We compromise and pick a Dr Seuss, which I hate with all my heart and soul with all its no I don't, yes I do, who do you, let's all do you etc. It also goes for about thirteen hours. Daniel is leaping around the room like a moth by a lightbulb and Mia decided to let loose a sewage works in her 4th nappy of the evening.
Finally. One hour later, I can look in on them all peacefully sleeping, one arm over their heads, eyelashes brushing their flushed cheeks, and think Always Use A Condom.

Monday, 19 November 2007


Avarice means Greed.

And with that over with, let's go on a wee tour.

How fitting that I spent my last evening of no drinking in Dunedin, where I was at University for 2 years in the late 90's. That sounds like ages ago and I guess it was.

Dunedin was a place where I learnt a fair few life lessons, namely, if you don't go to lectures you won't pass, and that carpet covered with beer and wine stops smelling after a couple of months.

Pretty isn't it? The buildings are super nice, apart from some hideous 70's mistakes. Don't be fooled by the blue sky and green trees. Dunedin is a super hell-hole in the winter, which usually goes for about 8 months, and we spent most of our time huddled together on the couch swathed in duvets, each with a blow heater aimed at our feet.

This is the Geology building. I used to go to my Asian Politics lectures here. Go figure.

This was our first flat, at 641 Castle Street. I lived here with 4 other girls, all from nice backgrounds. My mother saw this place and lost it. She couldn't believe I was going to live in a house where the floors sloped, the doors didn't shut and the loo was outside. You can imagine the below zero nights scampering out the door standing on all the broken glass. The flat was condemned, but we begged the owner to let us rent it. He relented, and has obviously been persuaded further, because that was 9 years ago.

We all used to smoke like chimneys, I'd have 1 every ad break, meaning that although I got up at about 11am every day, I'd easily get through a packet. On some cold clear nights the smoke wouldn't disperse, and it would appear that our house was on fire.

My flatmate and I would watch TV all day, from the talk shows, to the children's telly. "Arthur" was my favourite, the little canadian bunny I think he was, with his sister D-W.

I really don't have much recollection of my first year, probably because I was always a) just watching telly or b) getting really drunk. We would go out Thursday, Friday and Saturday nights. We would drink a bottle of wine each or share a cask, then head to the pub and drink jugs of beer. It was awesome. Oh to have those days back again.

This was our other haunt. Kings Dairy was right in the middle of Studentville, and must have made a mint from us. They did the best sausage rolls. Every Wednesday after my 4 hour Psych lab I would get 2 sausage rolls and a V energy drink for lunch, and even now, when I get a V, it always tastes like sausage rolls.

This was our second flat. 519C Leith Street. It was called "The Lockwood" and was indeed made from wood. It was way nicer than our previous hovel, and I had a gorgeous room that overlooked the Leith River and the Bot Gardens. I spent most of my time in there, having got my boyfriend back from overseas, and somewhat co-incidentally, the onset of depression, where getting out of bed and facing People, urgh, People, was just too damned hard. By the second semester I wasn't going to any lectures at all, and threw in the towel and went home. Now, I think what a waste, but then I couldn't see any other way out of it. 8 years later I have a great career and some great memories, and who knows, maybe I'll stop shaving my armpits and wear Birkenstocks and become an Adult Student (shudder).

Stop me if I'm wrong, but Glass Blowing/Dentistry are not an obvious mix?

Tuesday, 13 November 2007


Sacre bleu mes amies. Forgive me for my hiatus. Normally my lack of blogging is due to the couch being far too inviting, or my brain has gone on holiday and cannot come up with the usual witty repartee I entertain you all with.
No at the moment my lack of interweb contact is due to my job. I know. How dare it get in the way of my personal life. At the moment I am training a whole lot of staff members on a new system we have integrated. It means I train for 5-6 hours a day, then I do my normal 8 hour a day job on top of that. I have discovered the joys of lugging a ten tonne lap top to my car and back every day, and also that my house can't even get broadband access where it is, meaning I am doing some very late nights at the office. I feel like a hardened career bitch like Melanie Griffiths in Working Girl, except I don't talk like I've sucked on a whole lot of helium balloons.
So training. It's interesting. I've never trained anyone before, but I know the system inside out. So I tend to babble on and on using lots of acronyms and clicking in and out of screens, only to turn around and find one colleague checking emails, another staring out the window and another in the land of Nod. It has been a huge learning curve, but I now know why teachers do it, because when one of them clicks and becomes all enthusiastic about what we're doing, the feeling is really great.
I'm off around the country for the next 3 weeks, specifically to Hamilton, Dunedin and Wellington. I went to Uni in Dunedin and haven't been back since, so will be hilarious to go see my old flat and all the old haunts. It's also supposed to be snowing down on the hills there at the moment while it's summer up here, so that'll be a shock.
What else is news. I got the t-shirt from the previous post in the mail last week, and have already worn it twice. It's super cool. I had a family weekend and Mum came to stay. We painted my back steps (will post photos soon) and Mum tried to put together a BBQ from kitset. If anyone has seen the Simpson's episode where Homer becomes a modern artist, you'll know what I mean when I say it looks interesting. We also gave the garden another good going over and shared the very first strawberry. It was spectacular.
One more week of no drinking to go - have done really well I reckon, but will be so fucking glad to get it over with. I find relaxing is really difficult, but on the other hand I am not tired as much, also I can concentrate much more. My skin is also better. But man oh man....I can just SEE that frosted glass of Sauv Blanc on the bar counter and my hand reaching for it. Oh yeeeaah.

Friday, 2 November 2007


Since there is zero actual lust of the boy kind happening in my life right now, I know, tick-tock-tick-tock, I'm going to post about things that I am lusting after at the moment.

Having a brand new house with all that fresh wall and floor space just makes a person hanker to fill it with Stuff. However having a brand new house goes hand in hand with a brand new fatass mortgage, and when I did my budget for this month after receiving my pay, I snickered, and tried it again. I then doubted Excel's summing abilities. Because for the month, I had a whole $40.00 to last me as play money after paying the mortgage, bills, and Visa. Turns out Excel was right, as usual, and this month has been notably fraught with penny pinching.

But it didn't stop me from buying this, sent to me by a friend who thought of me as soon as she saw it.

I haz it in red, and it is going to be my summer uniform.

I also have had this watch on layby for 2 months now. I really really really want to go and pick it up, but as I still have a huge amount to pay on it, it just all seems a bit much. Talk about buyers remorse, but hopefully I'll trip over a stack of dollars on the way to lunch today.

Gorgeous huh. It's like a bangle and sits really snugly around your wrist. Me like.

Other things I am coveting...the new CD from Robyn, the Swedish pop star who has reinvented herself...I love the track Konichiwa Bitches, says it all really.

I really want Bill Bryson's new book on Shakespeare but will have to wait till it comes out in paperback.

I'd love to carpet my lounge in a striking charcoal pattern, and curtain it with swishy silvery taffeta, and de claw my cat so he stops destroying my couch. Seriously it's 3 months old and is looking like a couch the students normally burn on the terraces at the cricket.

I'd REALLY like a new car, the little Escudo is no longer befitting my status of grown up home owner, plus it's starting to make a really odd noise, like metal scraping against metal (think Freddy Kreuger knives) so before it blows up on me, I'd like to get rid of it and buy a BMW 1 series. But because I am not a pasquillionaire, the little Holden Barina would be just as cool.

I know these are all just material things and that having a house as an investment is better than wasting your money on stuff that won't last, but it is seriously difficult to come to terms with not having the disposable income at your um.. disposal. I'm used to just buying whatever I feel like but hey I'm sure it's a good lesson to learn, to save up and feel you have really earned what you get. Learning lessons is so bloody boring though isn't it?

On that note I'm off to Napier this weekend for a family visit, my sister is coming down too with Amelie so Mum will have her 3 girls to cuddle. Now that is something money can't buy.